Oh choices how you vex me…. Today I had a presentation; did I ever tell you I hate not being fully prepared? I think one of the worst feelings is watching other people present with the thought of your own presentation looming over your head and not being completely confident in it. In part this is my fault as I didn't prepare my part as well as I should have but it also comes from not meeting up with group members before hand, not doing a group project as a group project… well this is my little rant but it draws it back to choices.
We as a group chose the last minute. Though something's like a car breaking own play their role if we had schedule to go over things before the day before we could have rescheduled. Like most things lately I chose things over schoolwork because I did not want to face the work or anything else. The outcomes of these choices are I didn't get to talk with Kara yesterday and had a horrible sleep because of it (partly the pop I drank too perhaps) I missed out on something I love, on the one I love because of my choices. In a previous post said I would not ignore or not realize the gifts and blessings in my life. This is a recommitment, and like I have figured out is something that needs to be a daily committal. At the beginning of each day I need to verbal commit it to God, to see the things in my life and being me. If I don't do these I won't think about them throughout the day and they will (speaking from my on experience) will slip. This is something I have realized for me, it may or may not help you wherever you are at.
Side note---- depression is a choice… another choice courtesy of my counseling foundations class were I almost definitely found out/was told I'm depressed… interesting eh?
On a positive note I brought joy to peoples lives with news the other day… I let you all wonder what that was… as to my day today I miss Kara and long to talk to her. I have errands to run and will be getting off this stupid hill and away for a little bit which will be glorious and I have the RA/RS Christmas party. I'm in a blah mood and not looking forward to fish and chips for lunch… well due to lack of sleep and perhaps the beginning of the day I will leave it here.
A depressed struggling stranger
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